Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Transformer Sequels

Watching Michael Bay films has become a bit embarrassing. And why? Is it because he forgets to shoot any proper character development and hands the rest of the film over to his trusty Visual Effects team? Is it because of the mindless supermodels throwing their scantily clad, sweat-soaked bodies at a dorky, supposedly likeable Shia LaBeouf? Or is it because we’re all fourteen years old?

Well, all of that may be true, but consider what the Transformers actually are: 40ft autonomous robotic aliens that transform into American Muscle Cars and save the World every day.

For fun.

Now, Michael. Granted, this is all quite impressive and you certainly have my attention, but have you forgotten your role as a film-maker? Of course you have. You’re enjoying yourself way too much. That’s because you’re fourteen. And so are we, but we’re getting older. We need more of that complexity/brutality that only Nolan/Tarantino seem to have a firm grasp on. ‘Revenge of the Fallen’ was cranked out with a cool 200 million to play with, and that’s exactly what you did with it. What I don’t understand is how you could possibly blow so much on a sequel with such poor dynamics that were already established in the first film.

After having time to digest this latest abomination properly, I suppose you have to give him some credit for ‘transforming’ his career from lens-flare soaked car commercials to multi-million dollar visual orgasms with a whitewash story written by an 8 year old. But not too much credit.

I only hope the next sequel will change my mind.

- Aaron

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